Survivor Testimony Blog

5 Comments

  1. Anonymous

    I was enrolled in ERA in June 2017, and I stayed there for 9 months. I was sent there when I was eleven, because my parents could not keep me safe in my own home. They desperately needed help, and they were willing to do whatever they needed to in order to keep me alive. I understand this, and I cannot blame my parents for the things that Eagle Ranch did to me.
    I can vouch first hand that Eagle Ranch is abusive. There are many people who disagree with me, and that is okay. We are all entitled to our own opinions. These are just my own personal experiences, with the lens of time to look back and reflect upon these things more maturely than I might’ve so many years ago.
    Unfortunately, I am not able to describe a full nine months of abuse into a few paragraphs. Instead, I will just share the most notable of my experiences- keeping in mind that I cannot be as detailed because it has been so many years. I found that I needed to distance myself far enough from Eagle Ranch along the timeline to where I could state the facts without as many emotional tints.
    Upon my arrival, I was walked across the campus and into the “intake room,” which is a small closet where there are shelves full of the only supplies you were allowed to have: three pairs of navy shorts, one pair of navy sweatpants, five maroon t-shirts, one maroon polo shirt, one maroon sweatshirt, seven pairs of socks, seven pairs of underwear, two training bras, prison sandals, a bar of soap, two-in-one shampoo and conditioner, five hair-ties, a wash-cloth, and a towel- all of which was only allowed to be washed once a week. In the intake room, you must strip completely naked in front of two strangers, who then check your every crevice to make sure that you are not sneaking something in. These strangers watch your naked body as you change, and put on one article of clothing at a time, starting with the tops.
    Immediately, I was placed in a temporary pod with a temporary therapist. For the first three days, a new “student” may talk only to the staff members and one student who is assigned to them and given the title of “buddy.” Now, this is great in theory, but here’s where my issue lies with this: You are a young child (or teen, in most cases) who has just been removed from your home, from your peers, from your school, and you are thrown into a room of 15-20 people, and are only allowed to talk to one of them. You are in a new and scary environment, and just have to sit there and be stuck in your thoughts (Please keep in mind, all of these children already have pre-existing mental health conditions).
    Also, as a new “student,” you must complete something called an “Amnesty Letter.” This is a letter that gruesomely details every aspect of the things you have done that ERA considers immoral. This includes things like drug use (when, where, who with, how many times, what, how, how did you get it, etc.), sexual history (who with, what happened, who gave, who received, how often, how many times, types of acts, how long, etc.), self-harm (how, when, what with, who knew, etc.). This Amnesty letter must be read and signed by at least three morning shift staff for the first half of the week, at least three morning shift staff for the second half of the week, at least two night shift staff for the first half of the week, and at least two night shift staff for the second half of the week, who may choose not to sign it if they think that you had done more or if they think that you didn’t go into enough detail. Once you have all of the required signatures, you must then stand up in front of a group of 15-20 people (who you will then be living with for an unspecified amount of time) and read it to all of your peers, who are then allowed to give you “feedback” on it. As a recap- I was an eleven year old girl who was being told by a group of 15 teenagers why it was my fault that my elementary teacher raped me. I don’t blame the kids- the staff and the therapists are the ones who drilled this mentality so strongly into them. Once you are finally done with all of that, you finally get to talk to your parents (and therapist) for the first time since you arrive. Except- you don’t. You are only allowed to do the following: Hi [insert parent name here], here’s a letter I wrote to you [reads amnesty letter]. I love you, bye! You are not allowed to have any communication during this call except for an extremely detailed list of everything that you’ve ever done wrong, closed with an “I love you.”
    Another notable moment was my twelfth birthday. A week prior, I had been asked what kind of cake I would like to have on my special day. I had recently gotten in trouble for self harming, and was placed on “Harm Watch” and I had lost my sugar privileges. This was before they asked what kind of cake I would like to have. When I told them, the cook agreed to make it. She did. My pod sang happy birthday to me. Then they went up, one by one, and ate my birthday cake- but I wasn’t allowed to. I was not allowed to eat my own birthday cake on my birthday, because a few weeks prior, I had scratched myself to the point of bleeding. I was turning twelve.
    Yet another time that was notable was when I was going through the required seminars for progression through the program. Now, I shall note that I am breaking a rule here by telling whomever is reading this what happens in Seminar. This rule is punishable at ERA. During Seminar 1, you are stood up in a circle of people and led around by a student that is higher up in the program than you are. They tell you to talk to each person in the circle as if they are someone who has hurt you terribly. (e.g. This is your mom, this is your dad, this is your rapist, this is your uncle, this is your best friend, etc.) The amount of pressure on this (plus- the revocation of water privileges for two hours after meals leading to dehydration), led me to have to quit seminar early because I had to throw up. I was then made fun of for this, and banned from returning to seminar until they had it three months later.
    There was also a kid there who was born a female, but was transitioning to a male. Eagle Ranch Staff had been instructed to restrain anyone who called him by his preferred name or pronouns. (i.e. I would get restrained for not calling them by their female name).
    Also, there was a boy who was “restrained” by a group of four grown staff for standing up without permission one time. This was such an extreme “restraint” that he had to be taken to the hospital and had a cast, a brace, and two sets of stitches. If this is not abuse, I don’t know what is. He was pulled from ERA two days later, but his brother was kept there due to manipulation and lies from the staff that the abused boy had deserved it.
    Here are some of the things that I was restrained for while in the custody of Eagle Ranch Academy:
    – Picking a scab
    – Biting my nails
    – Throwing up my food after a meal
    One very notable event was whenever I refused to eat a meal that I did not want to, I was restrained until they force-fed it to me. I was a disobedient child, and I spit it out. They spooned it back into my mouth which caused me to vomit. They then scooped my own vomit into my mouth until I had swallowed my own stomach contents. Only then did they stop placing pressure on my pressure points until I was in tears. Using this same technique, they have also broken others’ wrists.
    Here are some of the infamous punishments of Eagle Ranch Academy:
    -Cold Oatmeal (oatmeal that is a few days old and has been refrigerated)
    -Police Restraints (look up the positive control system restraints)
    -Interventions (I’ll speak on this later)
    -Strict (Instead of breaks and free times, you must do calisthenics at least 3-5 times a day. You must also wear polos and jeans or khaki’s [if you are allowed to have them])
    Here are some of the interventions:
    -A person in my pod was known for seeking attention. This person had to get on the floor, scream and throw a temper tantrum every single time that they lined up with their pod, screaming “I want attention, give me attention, I need attention, now!”
    -A person in my pod had trouble being assertive, and she had to go on an intervention called “Queen B” where she was required to make all of the decisions for the pod.
    -A girl diagnosed with depression was scared of being happy and told her therapist that she would rather be sad. Her therapist made her carry around a pool noodle with a picture of Eeyore on it that said “Today sucks a lot.” If she was caught smiling then her peers were supposed to yell at her that she wasn’t allowed to be happy, and she was supposed to be sad all day. Her peers would degrade her for being happy. This was their job.
    -A girl would constantly self harm, and her therapist made her wear baseball gloves at all times except for mealtimes and when in the restroom.
    -A girl was on “hobo” punishment, and she was required to carry around all of her belongings in a trash bag. If she set it down or left the trash bag unattended, her pod and staff members were instructed to tear it to shreds and steal her belongings. She was required to clean up the mess.
    -A boy was known for attention seeking, and was put on “ghost,” which means that no one (including staff) was allowed to talk to or acknowledge his presence.
    I’m sure there were more, but this was all that I could manage at the moment.
    On top of all of these things, all students were given a type of report card at the end of each week that labeled a person as “working,” “not working,” or “somewhat working.” In order to move forward in your treatment, you must have all W’s or W’s with minimal S’s. However, some of the staff members had personal vendettas against certain students, and would sabotage their reports with N’s. Therefore, one or two staff could hold one student back, just because of a personal dislike.
    I am now four years out of Eagle Ranch, and I just read a news article that stated a staff member (who had worked with me, personally). Was arrested and charged with raping a female student on the campus of Eagle Ranch Academy.
    If you are considering sending your child here, I cannot be the one to stop you. It is not my job to tell you not to send your children here. I receive no monetary gain if you listen to my review. I will never know if you do or not. Eagle Ranch will tell you that the people on websites like these are liars, but this is my truth. I wish I was creative enough to make up these stories, but unfortunately, I am not. Unfortunately, they are true. But, here is my last piece of food for thought: I needed trauma-processing therapy after leaving this program. The program that was supposed to heal my trauma caused a lot more trauma than anything else I had been through previously (including rape). After leaving Eagle Ranch, I was in other (much better) programs for another three years to heal that trauma. Eagle Ranch ruined me. I hope no other children will have to suffer through what I did.
    Best wishes and warm regards,
    Anonymous.

    Reply
  2. Christy

    I believe you. I was unfortunately part of this abusive program 1998-2002 I went to casa by the sea in Mexico and tranquility Bay in Jamaica

    Reply
    • Jacob

      I went to a place called Thayer Learning Center in Missouri. Thank God it’s shut down.

      Reply
  3. Brooke

    Thayer Learning Center in Kidder, Missouri was the program I was sent to at 13.

    Reply
  4. Emily

    I was at Carolina springs academy from 2005-2006 and it was a horrible experience!

    Reply

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