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I went to a WWASP called Horizon Academy in Amargosa Valley Nevada. I had just turned 13 and was there for over 2 years. After I was there for a few weeks to a month I started being raped by a few students. This lasted for months. I tried to get help from the director but I was ignored. I thought that it was normal. Eventually I got to see the local sheriff and gave him a report and told him the whole story. I never heard back from him for weeks until the director told me he told my dad, sheriff and every one else that I made the whole thing up. Before I go on, I do NOT want to continue any legal stuff.
Last night I submitted my story to /r/rapecounseling because I’ve been having excessive flashbacks and night terrors and I felt i need to get it off my chest. (i’ll put what I said below.) A few hours ago my dad went through my history and found that I submitted that. He was furious. He said he was going to send me back. And I heard him talking to someone on the phone. Im panicing I cant go back there. PLEASE DO NOT DO ANYTHING WITH THE POLICE OR ANY ORGANIZATION. If my dad really isnt going to send me somewhere and the cops call, I’m fucked. I just want to know what to do, or leave what happened to me before I get brainwashed again.
Heres what I posted on /r/rapecounseling:
Honestly I dont even know where to start. I’m (M,16) and am currently living at home with my dad and doing online school. I’ve have not yet been diagnosed with any mental illnesses, but my therapist believes I may have PTSD. I’ll start by saying I was born into a normal, happy family, Mom, Dad, and sister. When I was three my mother was diagnosed with leukemia and was hospitalized by the time I turned 5. So my mom was away in a different state and my dad was with her. Thats when I first felt alone, isolated and unloved. She died when I was 8 and I was devastated. After that I wasn’t doing well in school, and had a few mental breakdowns, especially after my grandma died. (keep in mind that I’m not trying to ramble, I’ve just never really shared much about myself.) I’ll skip ahead to when I was 12. I ran away from home, didnt get far at all, but my dad was furious and said he going to send me to a “boarding school” Except it wasn’t a boarding school. It was one of many facilities out there called the World Wide Association of Specialized Programs in the middle of a desert in Nevada. I was the youngest one there, and one of the few that wasn’t court ordered (there were about 100 kids there at the time.) The feeling of betrayal and distrust towards my dad was overwhelming. Like I said most people there were court ordered, violent, scary, and worse of all, horny. One day, after being there for a few weeks, I went to go to the dorms to do laundry with a few other people, 2 students and a staff. I remember turning around the corner, seeing a white pillow fly at me, and being about to breathe. I don’t know if I was unconscious from being in shock, or being chocked, but I woke up with an unbearable pain between my legs. The two boys would describe what they did to me over and over every day, and the staff member watched. After the second time they did this, I tried to find help. I talked to the director of the facility, to see if I can get something done about what was going on. He was able to get the local county sheriff to come question me. He had me write a report, and I did and I gave it to him. The sheriff told me he will send a detective to come question me and the kids. 2 weeks pass by, no detective. I was able to talk to the director again and he told me that he told the sheriff and my dad that I admitted to making the whole thing up…. What he told me has been stuck in my head ever since, his voice and everything. So the rape continued, almost every week, by different students, and and different staff members watching. Eventually I gave in, I let them because there was NOTHING else I could possibly do. I had live live with this for a long 28 months. I haven’t been able to cry since then, I don’t feel passion, or love, or happiness. Sadness would be a blessing compared to what I’ve been feeling for the past 3 years. I’ve lost all of my faith, my spirituality, and the trust I could have in my dad. The entire time I was there, he would brag and brag about how wonderful his life was going, he even got married. I don’t want to sound whiney or like I’m exaggerating. I’ve never gotten into this much detail about what happened before, and to be honest, I trust you guys, guys who I don’t even know, more than my dad. So yeah, I just started seeing a therapist and I hope it goes well and maybe I can move on. So feel free to ask me any questions you want, and please give me feedback or something, I realy need help.
Jade Robinson, Youth Foundation Success Academy, Horizon Academy, Rape, Abuse, Youth Foundation Inc.
Redditor/ Horizon Academy Survivor, Raped, Bullied, Isolated and In Fear of Being Sent Back
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I am so sorry to hear of the struggles you have been through. The Only way i realized to get past my own suffering from being at a program was to do this practice called sungazing. Please google HRM sungazing protocol and start to cleanse your body, mid, and spirit. This practice of looking at the sun during the safe times have been known to cure every mental disease, physical disease and gets rid of human suffering. This is completely only if you are ready to get past this. Take care
I’m so sorry for your experiences and the betrayal of being ignored. I wish your father could see what goes on behind those gates. In Cross Creek, mid 90’s a young lady was raped with a toilet plunger after her attackers drugged her without her knowledge and I did nothing out of the fear if I spoke up I’d be next. This was not an isolated incident. I wish I would have done something and it haunts me to this day. Almost every WWASP survivor that goes to a Dr gets the PTSD diagnosis along with a horrified stare, if we’re believed.
You will find peace, letting this out is a huge first step. You may not know me, but I love you, you are strong, you are pure, and no one can take that from you!
Thank you so much for sharing you story. The fact that you are being called a liar, and are not being supported or protected by “authorities” (why do we even call them that?) or your own Father, is appalling. Do you have anywhere else you can go? I’m sure you don’t feel very comfortable having to walk on egg shells around your own home, in fear that you will be sent back to an abusive institution. We are here for you, and won’t let you be abused. Please let me know whatever I can do to help. If you would like to contact me personally my e-mail is msinead21@yahoo.com. I have to agree with Brian’s comment about sun-gazing. I encourage you to read a bit about it. It has helped me greatly, and actually improved my eyesight (as well as mental acuity)
Hey man,
My name is kyle and im 25 years old and went to a wwasp program when i was 15. Couple words of advice that I think are simPle enough to follow and crucial to adhere to.
1.) it sucks your Dad won’t listen to you. There are few things more frustrating than family only seeking to be understood and never seekin to understand. But the bottom line is, if he is threatening to send you back, you don’t want to do anything to trigger his frustration. Rule number one, stay away from the program. If telling your dad the truth only makes him more mad Then he’s not ready to hear it and you need to make sure you don’t do anything that would make him want to send you back. You gotta be smart. work on making progress with your dad in the areas yOu can.
2.) pour your fucking heart out to your therapist. Few people listen. Most just wait for there turn to talk. If your therapist is one of the only ones willing to listen, then take advantage of that and be completely honest with yourself and your therapist. Even If your therapists advice sucks, it doesn’t hurt to hear yourself vent every once in a while.
3.) my name is Kyle Tozer. You can find me on Facebook. You can shoot me a friend request and chat If you ever feel the need.
I originally wrote this for the Reddit post, but since it’s been deleted (why?), I’ll just re-post it here instead:
This was really hard to get through. I spent nearly two years in a former WWASP facility called Spring Creek, so I can relate in some ways. I should preface what I’m about to say by making it clear to people on Reddit who are unfamiliar with WWASP that EVERYTHING HE HAS SAID IS TRUE, OR AT THE VERY LEAST, CREDIBLE. I suppose I can’t say with 100% certainty that it’s true because I don’t know him, but I personally do know people who have endured what he has, so I’d be more surprised if he were making it up than if he weren’t. I was never personally raped at Spring Creek—of course, fate decided that should eventually happen anyway, two weeks ago, but I digress—but there was at least one occasion where I nearly was gang-raped by half a dozen boys, and I was repeatedly beaten, molested, and of course subjected to the daily psychological horrors that make WWASP what it is. I was choked unconscious; bones were broken—standard WWASP.
Your story brought up quite a lot for me and made me cry, drink, and spend some time on the phone with crisis lines, and I don’t know what I can do to help, but if there’s anything I might be able to do, then I’ll sure as hell try. I know what it’s like to be backed into a corner by stronger boys and be terrorized by them; I know what it’s like to eventually give in and let them do whatever they want without protest because you know you’re damned anyway and you hope that perhaps if you don’t fight back they’ll show a bit of mercy (which of course they never do). I see a lot of myself in your story and it makes me really angry. Ten years (to the exact date!) after I was sent to WWASP, the same shit is happening to others—I read this yesterday and you’ve been on my mind for the past 24 hours +. I just wish there was something I could do to help. This whole thing makes me feel absolutely miserable.
If you need to talk—about this, life in general, or the damned currency markets for all I care—PLEASE contact me, and hopefully I can say something that sounds all wise and Yoda-like while making you feel a bit better. I’m not sure if I can, but as I said, I’ll sure as hell try. I have given Chelsea my full consent to relay my contact information to you, so I hope that you have already received it.
Before I close, I’ll just say this: from everything I endured and witnessed at Spring Creek, it’s always the losers who hurt other people. They probably called you all manner of names before, during, and after hurting you (for a while they called me “Bridget” to feminize me, because apparently feminization justifies rape and molestation), but regardless of what they said and the brutal means they used to drive the message home, you are NOT the loser, or the pussy, or whatever—what they did was sick and cowardly and only exposes THEM as the sick bastards. They’ll probably end up in jail, and whether they end up raping other victims or becoming the new victims, they’re headed towards a dead end with that kind of behavior. You’re smarter than they are—yes, you also have WAY more trauma on your plate than they do now, but you’re smarter, so use that!
I just lost my train of thought, but as I reread what I just typed, I wish I’d take my own advice a bit better. Anyway… stay strong.
As this Easter grows near. I am reminded of the day I was legally kidnapped from my parents home and taken away to Cross Creek Manor. Where I watched so many girls brutally beaten, overdosed on legal unnecessary medication, and told each and everyday their parents no longer cared about them and would now be forgotten. To all survivors of emotional, physical, and mental abuse may this Easter, be in rememberance of those we have lost, those we have gained, and those we can help through sharing our experiences along the way. I wish for you all a Happy Easter- one filled with happiness and joyful memories ♡♥♡♥♡
I dont know what to say about this website. i just got back from the program a couple months ago and it honestly saved my life. Through the seminars and inidividual therapy i learned to value myself and those arouund me and i am now sober for almost a year. Jade and Chaffin have not once made me feel not safe and the program overall is ran by great staff members who truly seem to care about the children they work with. Yeah its not somewhere people like to be but when you make the decisions we did to get there they cant make the place seem like paradise. i am thankful i got put into youth foundations/horizon academy.
Im a little confused i went to horizon academy in amargosa and i dont want to say i dont believe this guy but im skeptical. There was a bunch of weird staff on the night shift but out of the regular “dorm parents” most of them seemed to genuinely care and wouldnt watch a rape. I feel you on the feeling betrayed and abandoned by your dad but you were sent there for a reason. I doubt it was because you ran away once. I was there in 2006 and 2007 and some stuff didnt make since. Before and during while i was upper status trainer on the guys side there werent staff that took people to do laundry it was an upper status and some level 3s. We wouldnt have someone that was there for a few weeks or even months go due to a possibility of them running. It was never hostile or violent while i was there. There wasnt ever even an actual fight. Going back to the rape thing. I would have been one of the upper status people taking you up to the dorms and ive never seen anything remotely close to being considered rape. If anything people would glorify themselves in their drug stories about back at home. I doubt this comment will last long up here but i still doubt this guys story. If i was still under 18 i would do anything to make sure i dont go back to “the program”.