My name is Tammi and I am a WWASP survivor from likely the worst time at the infamous TranquilityBay, Jamaica. Further, once I had been there for 22 of the 24 months I attended, they shortened the program drastically; wasn’t I lucky? Anyways, just as I began to see there light at the end of the tunnel knowing that I was headed towards transition and then, I was one of 2 people in closest, worst spots. I was on the roof, she glanced at me before diving off. The other one was Shira, she was in the courtyard at the time. But Jay Kay said that we as upper levels had to shove it down and be there for the lower levels. At that time I became scared that, since it was the first year they offered transition at TB, that I would be assigned to stay. I began not sleeping and having night terrors.

When I left for Jamaica, Clinton was president and then when i got back; Bush was president. So, that was bad enough and then put PTSD on top of that. It went on to affect my life in a chain reaction spiraling downward as when I got home, I was scared of the dark and slept in my moms room at 16 years old and she told me i couldnt do that at 16 and begged her to take me to a psychiatrist and she wouldnt which further confirmed to me that I was sent away to the program, not because I was like the other kids (with rich parents too high profile for their delinquent kids to be reflecting poorly upon them) Oh no no no….my Mom was poor, she borrowed money from her own mother to get RID of me. No letters sent just pics of her on vacation…

THEN when I came back I buckled down and I got into freaking Johns Hopkins University School of Nursing. I asked my Mom for simply her SIGNATURE; NOT for the money. She refused.

Let me just break that down for you. She borrowed money from HER MOM to help her daughter under the guise that she was scared for my life (I was only smoking pot) BUT when I came home, REFORMED, and did something crazy like got into Hopkins, as MY MOM, she refused to even just SIGN!!!! AND, as if she thought i was dumb, she tried to hide that she just got a new pool installed in her house. Then 2 months later she met a guy she liked at the grocery store, moved in with him, and she has not hasnt so much as gone back to that house. (That pool was the COST of my education.)

So, what did I do, I made it a full time job finding scholarships and I found so many that i actually got PAID my first 2 years off school. THEN after doing it on my own, i thought she would be proud and she was jealous, almost let down that i pulled it off. So, I became class president the first year out of spite and i went a long time without talking to her.

Finally, when my oldest son was around 16 or so, he expressed to me that he felt him and i had different opinions of forgiveness and the value of it…..i let that sit with me.

8 weeks ago, exactly one month into being 18 years old, my son died of a fentanyl overdose.

This have been hard and I do admit I learned a lot from the program, things I use on a daily basis and things I have come up with on my own that seminars inspired me to adopt.

Anyways, as if I was possessed by my late son, he came into my heart and took all of the hate and fear away and i picked up the phone and called my mom.

Ironically it was at THIS stage that I started down a bad path with drugs because….I don’t know, i mean, i cannot literally think of anything that could hurt worse in life. But, I’m clean now and trying to pull myself back together.

My fiancé and I am in the process of developing/campaigning/crowdfunding to give those who are addicted to opiates a DIFFERENT option other than a 12 step program to get off of it. One where you do not need to be powerless. One where you can do it in private as it is no ones business, and in such a way that drugs don’t become the topic of conversation for the rest of your life.

I am an RN, as I am sure you guessed since I graduated Hopkins School of Nursing, plus I’ve recovered from an opiate habit twice with my spouse on our own and with the help of the sublocade shot to take away that option and free your minds creative areas that addiction suppresses.

I was curious is anyone who went to the program had any kind of trauma or PTSD such that it led them into a funk whereby anyone has become addicted to anything either currently or in the past?

Oh lastly, I spent years as the main witness i a class action lawsuit against WWASPS and after years, the pro bono law firm, Turley Law, had to give up because I guess the mormons (WHO FUND WWASPS if you didnt know) also have tons of sway in the Utah judicial system which is where the mother company is based out of and therefore had to be the forum for the litigation. But, through some underhanded way, we were stripped of our due process with no options to appeal to a higher court.

I think the thing that sucks the most about being in Jamaica that long during those impressionable ages is that I severely lack knowledge about American History and it sometimes makes me feel insecure.

Anyways, I was there from 2000-2003; FOUNDATION FAMILY!!! OG but then we split when more people came and I was then a challenger but I’ll always represent Foundation!

I DO miss Jamaica. Not the program, but the country and the mountains.

Anyways, anyone remember me? I’m Tammi 🙂

Name:
Tammi W

Program:
Tranquility Bay, Jamaica (BEFORE the bars went up; after my witness of the suicide had already done damage.)

Location:
West Indies, Jamaica; Treasure Beach. Calabash Bay; St. Elizabeth Parish

Years Attended:
2000 – 2003